
Mark Twain Reader
Millennial
Female + male + dependent(s)
Oklahoma
Speed of commitment:
Fast: Open to a situation that takes everyone being all-in from the start (with contracts & clarity), In between: Open to a commitment after a defined time for a trial run, Slow: Open to a situation where trust can build over time
IC types I would live in or am forming:
Artist collective & live work space, Cohousing: private residences around shared space, Cottage industry in community (e.g. biz partners or recreation venture teams), Ecovillage or agrihood, Farm or ranch, Multi-family shared house, Multi-house collective (resource-sharing among houses not adjacent), Off-grid commune, Resource-sharing commune
Food production:
Working toward a mix of producing our own food and buying groceries
IC seeker or founder/resident:
IC seeker or cofounder: I’m seeking to join likeminded others as a core group in founding a new IC. Together we will establish a vision and norms.
ICmatch group or IC I'm part of:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Seeking_Community/
Service-based IC (population served):
Low income elderly, Low income families with children
Service-based IC (services offered):
Permanent residence
Vulnerable population as a proportion of residents:
Less than half
Residential proximity:
House mates (separate bedrooms, shared kitchen), Multi-house collective (shared resources, but IC houses might be scattered within a traditional neighborhood), Separate units (separate apartments but some shared common areas with shared resources), Shared land (separate houses possibly with some shared buildings)
Ownership types:
Co-operative (collectively owned separate houses or apartments), Join an established IC to learn and possibly stay, Joint land purchase to subdivide, hold shares, or hold "tenancy in common", Multi-house collective (shared resources, but houses have separate ownership or are separate rentals), Rent-to-own with shared housing or shared land, Whatever the group can agree on
Reasons for shared housing:
Ecological sustainability to reduce carbon footprint, Friendship and sharing activities, Having a “chosen family” to share good times and support each other thru hard times, Having social interaction while limiting the amount of influence or interaction with society, Helping each other with childcare, Lower cost of living, Shared land, shared community hub such as gardens or meeting space, but not shared housing), Sharing meals and chores, Sharing resources (spaces, equipment, tools, vehicles, gardens), Traveling frequently and wanting a home base that’s maintained, Working together in a business (e.g., remote location)
Décor of shared areas:
Decisions based on practical utility and durability, Prefer furniture & decor that's kid-or-pet friendly (used or easily replaceable)
Clutter level of shared living areas or work space:
Average level of "lived in" look, Creativity in progress (translate: not tidy in designated work space), Tidy in shared spaces, with a designated place for things
Cleanliness level (germs & crumbs):
All food counters & tables wiped down after each use, All food counters & tables wiped down daily to not attract pests, Dishes washed (or loaded into dishwasher) daily to not attract pests, Disinfectants must be ecologically safe products (chemical sensitivity), Medical need for a dust-free environment, Medical need for a regularly disinfected environment
Yard or landscaping:
Covered space for storage, Gardens and edible landscaping, Mowed, trimmed, manicured outdoor space, Paved walkways and driveways, Space for kids and/or dogs to run, Tidy and clutter-free outdoors with storage out of sight
Neighborhood or scenery:
Clean well maintained urban or suburban surroundings are a priority worth paying extra for, Nature scenery is a priority worth paying extra for
Current city/town and state/province:
Oklahoma
Nation(s) of current residence:
United States
Preferred regions:
U.S. Missouri, U.S. midwest region, U.S. rocky mountain region
Population density:
Remote, Rural, Small town, Suburban or exurban
Ideal location(s):
South Oklahoma Preferred right now
Commitment to my current location:
Committed to location because of friendship and/or extended family, Happy with current location but open to considering other options, Must stay in current location for childrens school or co-parenting, Want to eventually commit to a permanent location if it goes well, Would relocate if group decides to try another location together
Relocation capacity:
Committed to the current general location for the foreseeable future, Ready to move from my current residence now or in the near future, Ready to move from my general area now or in the near future, Ready to move from my general area within the next few years
Resource sharing:
Car share, Care of elderly, disabled, or incapacitated relatives, Child care swap, Emergency preparedness efforts, Farm or food forest (share work and produce), Garden (share work and produce), Joint business (share work and profits), Meal preparation, Pet care swap, Time bank, Tool share (maintenance and use of expensive equipment)
My socioeconomic status:
Substantial assets but lower income
Leisure and lifestyle:
Somewhat frugal about leisure and entertainment expenditures
Leadership availability:
I'm willing to join as part of a core leadership team
Roles and responsibilities:
Clear responsibilities are important to minimize conflict, Flexible responsibilities are often best, which aren't assigned or micromanaged, In a reciprocal relationship you give about as much as you get, but it happens without keeping track, In a small family-like group, the saying applies, “to each according to their need, from each according to their abilities", Transactional relationships are more fair; to a reasonable extent there should be accountability through written agreements
Common practical skills:
Carpentry & repair, Childcare, Cleaning, Cooking for groups, Farm animal care, First responder (first aid) or EMT, Gardening or crop cultivation, Group facilitation, Organizing & labeling, Permaculture
Experience or schooling:
Activism & organizing, Animal training or care, Architecture, Business management, Carpentry & construction, Computer science, Consensus facilitation, Event planning & management, Experience teaching adults, Filmmaking, Finance, economics, timebanking, Food handling certification trainer, Food preservation (e.g., cheesemaking, home canning, drying, smoking), Group therapy or processing, Horticulture or permaculture, Long term rentals and maintenance, Marketing, Mediation or dispute resolution, Medicine - alternative, Musical performance, Natural building, Ordained minister or religious scholar, Outdoor survival skills (e.g., hunting, foraging, fire starting), Performative dance, Psychology, Public speaking, Security (may include experience with weapons), Short term rentals and hospitality, Social dance, Sociology, Sports or physical recreation, Standup comedy, Theater, Travel, Visual art, Waterworks, plumbing, sanitation, Website design, Writing
Languages:
English and American Sign language
Occupation(s) and expertise:
Food related, Interpreting, Transportation and Logistics
Years lived in an IC:
Lived with roommate(s) or housemate(s), Lived with sibling(s) or other non-parent relatives, No experience, but determined to make it work
Professional certifications or degrees:
Commercial Driver
Generation:
Millennial
Generations intended in IC:
Children (born 2013 or later), Gen X (born 1965 – 1980), Gen Z (born 1997 – 2012), Millennial (born 1981 – 1996), Older boomer (born 1946 – 1954), Younger boomer (born 1955 – 1964)
Number of infants and preschoolers:
2
Number of grade-school children:
2
Number of working adults:
2
Alcohol (tolerable rules):
Should be regulated by group decision only if it becomes problematic
Tobacco smoking (tolerable rules):
Should only be allowed outdoors
Cannabis (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed with medical prescription, Should be regulated by group decision only if it becomes problematic
Psychedelics (tolerable rules):
Legal psychedellics are okay if not disrupting to others, Should be allowed by those authorized to use them for ceremonial purposes
Illegal recreational drugs (tolerable rules):
Should not be policed by the community, as long as no minors are involved and others are not negatively impacted
Overnight guests (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed in designated guest areas, Should be permitted in limited circumstances as decided by the governance process, Should be subject to group decision only if it becomes problematic, Should not be a concern of the community, as long as everyone's privacy is respected
Daytime visitor access (tolerable rules):
Should be discussed and limited by the IC agreements, Should not be restricted, Should not be restricted after certain individuals or visitor types are approved, Should require that community is informed of planned visits
Nudity (tolerable rules):
Should be welcome and discussed through the governance process, to consider each individual’s preferences
Required disclosures:
Background check for landlord/tenant disputes, Current addictions even if under treatment, On sex offender registry, Past felony conviction
Religious or spiritual practice-based IC:
No mandate of strict adherence to shared religious beliefs and practices
My religious beliefs or practices:
Christian (universalist), New Age (mix), New Thought (law of attraction), Spiritual but not religious
Practices welcome in IC:
Agnostic, Atheist, Bahai, Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jewish, Near-death experience or out-of-body, New Age (mix), New Thought (law of attraction), Sikh, Spiritual but not religious, Spiritualist, Taoist, Theosophical Society
Ecological preservation ethics:
Commitment to reduce, re-use, recycle, Composting toilet, Gray water recycling where permitted, Local food commitment for low carbon footprint, Use of alternative power such as solar or wind
Size of community:
11 to 20, 21 to 50, 6 to 10, Under 6
Sense of togetherness:
An IC should foster close interpersonal relationships, An IC should have regular mandated “group work” to resolve conflicts as they arise, An IC should have regular opportunities to encourage all to share their feelings
Gender + number:
Female + male + dependent(s)
Genders welcome in IC:
Female, Male, Non-binary
My current couple situation:
I'm in committed partnership
Couple situations welcome in IC:
Available somewhat (e.g., in open relationship), Committed closed partnership(s) (e.g., married monogamous couples), Not applicable, Not available (e.g., you're okay if you're not going to be a threat to my primary relationship), Single (not in a committed closed partnership)
My sexual orientation:
Monogamous, Straight
Sexual identities welcome in IC:
Heterosexual (straight), LGBTQ+ (non-normative gender identity and/or same-sex attraction), Monogamous (committed to a single sexual partner), Non-monogamous, Polyamorous (in more than one physically intimate relationship with consent of all involved)
Sex & intimacy norms in IC:
A topic discussed with curiosity and respect, allowing for experimentation around what works for the community, A topic not discussed by the community, Other, Primarily left to the individual to determine, with the understanding that personal choices can impact community culture
Physical affection:
I am a big hugger; I’m affectionate even with people I don't know well, I enjoy hugs and lean toward the easily affectionate side, I selectively enjoy hugs; I lean more toward the physically reserved side, It depends
Other ICmatch members in my household or IC:
https://icmatch.org/members/?user_id=564
My availability for physical intimacy:
Not currently open to a new relationship
Children in IC:
Children are welcome but not a necessity (not a dealbreaker issue), Children are welcome if 8 or older and well-behaved (e.g., remote work group without childcare), I have dependent child(ren) living with me and I am only seeking community with other families with children
Children present in household:
Full time
Other people’s children:
Children are the responsibility of their parents, so any shared care needs to be agreed on between individuals, I am open to a community of free-range children who are allowed to roam the majority of community spaces unsupervised, I am open to sharing child-care responsibilities such as carpooling or swapping child-care, I prefer a community in which there are on-site designated childcare facilities to allow other adults to work, I want to be in a setting in which all feel a responsibility for well-being of children in the community, Parents shouldn't be so untrusting that they consider all adults a potential child abuser
Behavior correction:
Parents shouldn't allow their child(ren) to be loud and disruptive in group settings, Parents shouldn't be offended if other adults respectfully question their child(ren)'s behavior, Parents shouldn't have to micro-manage their child(ren) for the benefit of adults around them
Children sheltered from:
Drug use, Sexual behavior or images
Screen time (acceptable rules):
No screen time or content limits, Parents should agree on online content allowed (e.g. video games, social media) because children will share with each other, Screen time and content limits are up to individual families, Screen-free locations agreed on as a group, Screen-free times agreed on as a group to encourage outdoor play with peers
Dogs:
Indoor dog(s) okay, Indoor dog(s) okay if small, Indoor dog(s) okay if some rooms are off limits, Not applicable, with separate residences each household decides, Outdoor dog(s) okay, Outdoor dog(s) okay if not frequent barkers
Cats:
Indoor cat(s) okay, Not applicable, with separate residences each household decides, Outdoor cat(s) okay
Farm animals or pets I have or want:
Chickens, rabbits
Plant-based or not:
Cage-free eggs okay, Certified-humane meat okay, Conventional eggs okay, Conventional meat products okay, Conventional milk products okay, Everyone makes their own food choices even when eating together, Fish okay, Small local dairy products okay
Organic:
All food choices are accepted, Not applicable (e.g., no obligation for shared meals), Organic non-certified is okay
Shared meals (acceptable norms):
Prefer shared meals weekly or monthly, Shared meals are necessary community glue, Shared meals are necessary for efficiency and low cost, Shared meals should be optional
Medical risk bubbles:
I can commit to taking extra precautions for others in a high-risk category, I can live with or work physically close to people who do not take precautions against infection, allergy, or injury
Pandemic norms:
Keep good health practices for good immune function, Masks only when in public and mandated, No masks or distancing around friends and family who aren't part of IC, Not applicable, Only normal hygiene within the IC; no extra precautions, Unvaccinated, Vaccinated, Whatever results from group decision-making process
Noise level:
A lively social environment should be the norm, As long as the vibe is positive, loud gatherings can be frequent, Different noise tolerance can be managed by having designated times for noise and quiet, Just keep it down enuf that neighbors don't complain, One quiet space should be reserved for those who need to focus on work, One space should be available for those who like to have videos or games on frequently, Parents with children shouldn't have to constantly keep them quiet
Sleep:
I keep a late bedtime, I keep an early bedtime, I often stay up past midnight, I’m a late riser, I’m an early riser, I’m not very consistent with my waking and bedtimes, My sleep is easily disturbed so I need quiet at night, My sleep is not easily disturbed
Comfort & convenience:
I can participate in a rugged life and hard physical work, I can participate with others who do not tolerate rugged life or extreme temperatures, I can tolerate extreme temperatures, I enjoy a rugged life and hard physical work
Tech savvy:
I’m pretty good troubleshooting tech
Internet connection & phone signal:
I can work without consistent internet connection, We have reliable wifi
Off-grid:
Is a workable favored option, Is not the plan if it doesn't work for others I want to be in community with, Is okay but not so important, Is workable for a part time location
Leisure time:
Gardening, Media Consumption, Video Games, Intellectual Conversations, raising children.
Political orientation:
Stressed sideliners
Culture influencers:
Jordan Peterson, Joe Rogan, Food Forest Heaven, Oliver Anthony, Avi Kaplan
Civic, political, or activist groups or movements:
ADA
Extroversion (under 50% means more introverted than average):
54
Emotional even keel (under 50% means more ups & downs than average):
70
Agreeableness (under 50% means less compliant or more contrary than average):
71
Conscientiousness (under 50% means more easygoing than average):
62
Open to new experiences / imagination (under 50% means more traditional than average, sticks with "tried and true"):
40
Tendency for dealing with others' expectations:
Rebel
Myers-Briggs (& Keirsey-Bates) temperament type:
ISTP : The Problem Solvers
Enneagram type:
TYPE 6
Astrological sign(s):
Leo
Dealmakers:
Mutual Child Care
Tendency regarding others' expectations:
Rebel