Candlekeeper
Millennial (30-45)
Female + Male + dependent(s)
Dunkirk, NY Georgia, U.S.
Speed of commitment:
In between: Open to a commitment after a defined time for a trial run
IC types I would live in or am forming:
Activist commune supporting shared work, Artist collective & live work space, Cohousing: private residences around shared space, Cottage industry in community (e.g. biz partners or recreation venture team), Disaster prep or timeshare cabin, Ecovillage or agrihood, Expat residential community, Farm or ranch, Life partner also into community, Mobile home park or RV spot, Off-grid, Tiny homes community, Trial run: Join a household maybe work-trade
Food production:
Not involved in farming or gardening
IC seeker or founder/resident:
IC curious: I’m new to this, so I’m investigating what might be a fit for me.
Service-based IC (population served):
Aged out foster teens, Animal rescue, In-system foster kids, Learning disability, Mild to moderate mental illness, Neurodivergent needing accommodations, Refugee resettlement, Runaway or homeless minors
Service-based IC (services offered):
Long term shelter, Permanent residence, Provides housing while attending college or vocational training, Provides school or vocational training for the selected group(s), Provides support services possibly including paid work opportunities for the selected group(s), Provides van or RV spot, Provides work-trade for rent, Short term shelter
Vulnerable population as a proportion of residents:
About half
Residential proximity:
Multi-house collective (shared resources, but IC houses might be scattered within a traditional neighborhood), Separate units (separate apartments but some shared common areas with shared resources), Shared land (separate houses possibly with some shared buildings)
Ownership types:
Join an established IC to learn and possibly stay, Rent a room as a trial run, Rent-to-own with shared housing or shared land, Rented with shared housing or shared land, Whatever the group can agree on
Reasons for shared housing or land:
Ecological sustainability to reduce carbon footprint, Friendship and sharing activities, Having a “chosen family” to share good times and support each other thru hard times, Shared land, shared community hub such as gardens or meeting space, but not shared housing), Sharing meals and chores, Sharing resources (spaces, equipment, tools, vehicles, gardens), Working together in a business (e.g., remote location)
Décor of shared areas:
A consistent aesthetic theme is important, Not important, Other
Clutter level of shared living areas or work space:
Creativity in progress (translate: not tidy in designated work space)
Cleanliness level (germs & crumbs):
All food counters & tables wiped down after each use, All food counters & tables wiped down daily to not attract pests, Dishes washed (or loaded into dishwasher) daily to not attract pests, Disinfectants must be ecologically safe products (chemical sensitivity), Dusting is not so important, Not planning to share cooking or dining space
Yard or landscaping:
Gardens and edible landscaping, Place to park my RV or tiny home, Tidy and clutter-free outdoors with storage out of sight, Yard aesthetics are not a priority
Neighborhood or scenery:
Clean well maintained urban or suburban surroundings are a priority worth paying extra for, Nature scenery is a priority worth paying extra for
Current city, town, or county:
Dunkirk
Nation(s) of current residence:
Georgia, U.S.
Preferred regions worldwide:
Canada ON, Canada northern provinces , Canada prairie provinces, Europe eastern non-EU, European Union, New Zealand, U.S. Alaska, U.S. Colorado, U.S. Oregon, U.S. Washington state, U.S. rocky mountain region, U.S. southwest region
Population density:
Nomadic, Rural, Small town, Suburban or exurban, Urban
Ideal location(s):
Colorado, NorCal, Oregon, Washington, Rockies, Appalachian regions
Commitment to my current location:
Want to eventually commit to a permanent location if it goes well, Want to experience a variety of communities and locations, Would relocate if group decides to try another location together
Relocation capacity:
Ready to move from my current residence now or in the near future, Ready to move from my general area now or in the near future, Ready to move from my general area within the next few years
State, province, or region:
New York (NY)
Resource sharing:
Emergency preparedness efforts, Farm or food forest (share work and produce), Garden (share work and produce), Meal preparation, Pet care swap, Time bank
My socioeconomic status:
Low income
Leisure and lifestyle:
Current work or personal demands leave little time for leisure
Leadership availability:
I'm willing to join as part of a core leadership team
Roles and responsibilities:
Flexible responsibilities are often best, which aren't assigned or micromanaged, In a reciprocal relationship you give about as much as you get, but it happens without keeping track, In a small family-like group, the saying applies, “to each according to their need, from each according to their abilities"
Common practical skills:
Carpentry & repair, Cleaning, Gardening or crop cultivation, Group facilitation, Organizing & labeling
Experience or schooling:
Activism & organizing, Carpentry & construction, Computer science, Experience teaching adults, Sports or physical recreation, Travel, Website design, Writing
Languages:
Georgian
Occupation(s) and expertise:
Carpenter, Urban Farmer, Mason
Years lived in an IC:
No experience, but determined to make it work
Experience in community:
I lived on an urban farm where I worked for my stay
Professional certifications or degrees:
UX/UI Design, CAI ISE
Generation:
Millennial (30-45)
Generations intended in IC:
Gen A (born 2013 – 2024), Gen B (babies! born 2025 – 2039), Gen X (born 1965 – 1980), Gen Z (born 1997 – 2012), Millennial (born 1981 – 1996), Younger boomer (born 1955 – 1964)
Number of working adults:
1
Number of non-working adults:
1
Alcohol (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed after work hours, Should be regulated by group decision only if it becomes problematic
Tobacco smoking (tolerable rules):
Should only be allowed outdoors
Cannabis (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed after work hours, Should be allowed in designated areas only, Should be regulated by group decision only if it becomes problematic
Psychedelics (tolerable rules):
Legal psychedellics are okay if not disrupting to others, Should be allowed only in a legal supervised therapeutic setting
Illegal recreational drugs (tolerable rules):
Should be dealt with by group decision in a manner to support non-use, Should not be allowed on the premises, Should not be policed by the community, as long as no minors are involved and others are not negatively impacted
Overnite guests (tolerable rules):
Should not be a concern of the community, as long as everyone's privacy is respected
Daytime visitor access (tolerable rules):
Should require that community is informed of planned visits
Nudity (tolerable rules):
Should be limited to private rooms or private residences (as is the norm outside the IC), Should be permitted within designated areas of the IC (e.g., a gated hot tub)
Required disclosures:
Background check for landlord/tenant disputes, Credit check, On sex offender registry, Past felony conviction
Prohibitions:
My wife is an immigrant
Religious or spiritual practice-based IC:
No mandate of adherence to shared religious beliefs and practices
Practices welcome in IC:
12 steps (from AA, NA, etc.), Agnostic, Astrology, Atheist, Bahai, Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jainist, Kabbalah, Mediumship, Muslim/Islam, Native American / First Nations, Near-death experience or out-of-body, New Age (mix), New Thought (law of attraction), Pagan, Pantheist, Rastafarian, Shamanic or indigenous animist, Spiritual but not religious, Spiritualist, Taoist, Tarot, Thelema, Wiccan, Zoroastrian
Ecological preservation ethics:
Commitment to reduce, re-use, recycle, Composting toilet, Gray water recycling where permitted, Minimize use of plastic, Use of alternative power such as solar or wind
Belief-related practices:
Set by personal beliefs, not set by community
Wisdom sharing:
We leave in equity and accountability, loyalty, honesty and integrity- these are the core principles of our household
Size of community:
11 to 20, 21 to 50, 51 to 150, 6 to 10, Over 150, Under 6
Sense of togetherness:
An IC should foster close interpersonal relationships, I do not want obligatory group work where we are expected to help resolve disputes, I do not want to be required or pressured to share feelings in a group setting, Relationships should develop naturally, not thru team building exercises or mandated group circles
My gender identity:
Female
Genders welcome in IC:
AFAB, AMAB, Female, Male, Non-binary
My current couple situation:
I'm in committed partnership
Couple situations welcome in IC:
Committed closed partnership(s) (e.g., married monogamous couples)
My sexual orientation:
Monogamous, Straight
Sexual identities welcome in IC:
Cisgender (gender aligns with natal sex), Heterosexual (straight), LGBTQ+ (non-normative gender identity and/or same-sex attraction), Monogamous (committed to a single sexual partner)
Sex & intimacy norms in IC:
Primarily left to the individual to determine, with the understanding that personal choices can impact community culture
Physical affection:
I selectively enjoy hugs; I lean more toward the physically reserved side, It depends
My availability for physical intimacy:
Consensual recreational sex is okay with me, depending, Prefer not to share at this time, Want to take it slow, be friends before more involvement
Significant other(s):
Male
Dependent(s):
+ dependent(s)
Racial or ethnic identities:
Georgian
Diversity beliefs or intentions:
It would be awesome to live with other Georgians
Race & Ethnicity:
White
Children in IC:
Children are welcome but not a necessity (not a dealbreaker issue)
Children present in household:
No dependent children
Other people’s children:
Children are the responsibility of their parents, so any shared care needs to be agreed on between individuals, I am open to a community of free-range children who are allowed to roam the majority of community spaces unsupervised, I prefer a community in which there are on-site designated childcare facilities to allow other adults to work, I want to be in a setting in which all feel a responsibility for well-being of children in the community
Behavior correction:
Parents shouldn't be offended if other adults respectfully question their child(ren)'s behavior, Parents shouldn't have to micro-manage their child(ren) for the benefit of adults around them
Children sheltered from:
Adult nudity, Drug use, Guns
Screen time (acceptable rules):
No screen time or content limits, Parents should agree on online content allowed (e.g. video games, social media) because children will share with each other, Screen time and content limits are up to individual families
Dogs:
Indoor dog(s) okay, Not applicable, with separate residences each household decides, Outdoor dog(s) okay
Cats:
Indoor cat(s) okay, Not applicable, with separate residences each household decides, Outdoor cat(s) okay
Special food needs:
Strongly prefer a high quality of food preparation, Strongly prefer home-processed foods
Plant-based or not:
Everyone makes their own food choices even when eating together
Organic:
All food choices are accepted, Not applicable (e.g., no obligation for shared meals)
Shared meals (acceptable norms):
Prefer shared meals weekly or monthly, Shared meals should be optional
Medical risk bubbles:
I can live with or work physically close to people who do not take precautions against infection, allergy, or injury, I can't live with or work physically close to people who need strict precautions from people in their IC
Pandemic norms:
Keep good health practices for good immune function, Maintain strict social distancing and masks outside the IC, Sanitize hands frequently in public, Sanitize hands frequently in the IC, Vaccinated, Whatever results from group decision-making process
Health conditions:
Autism, ADHD, CPTSD
Accommodations needed:
Mental health disability or condition
Noise level:
As long as the vibe is positive, loud gatherings can be frequent, Different noise tolerance can be managed by having designated times for noise and quiet, Just keep it down enuf that neighbors don't complain, One quiet space should be reserved for those who need to focus on work, One space should be available for those who like to have videos or games on frequently, Parents with children shouldn't have to constantly keep them quiet
Sleep:
I keep a late bedtime, I keep an early bedtime, I often stay up past midnight, I’m a late riser, I’m an early riser, I’m not very consistent with my waking and bedtimes, My sleep is easily disturbed so I need quiet at night
Comfort & convenience:
I can participate in a rugged life and hard physical work, I can participate with others who do not tolerate rugged life or extreme temperatures, I can tolerate extreme temperatures, I enjoy a rugged life and hard physical work
Tech savvy:
I’m pretty good troubleshooting tech
Internet connection & phone signal:
I must have wifi on 24/7, I need to be consistently connected to wifi during work hours, We have adequate mobile phone signal to connect to internet, We have ethernet cord to connect to internet without wifi, We have reliable wifi
Off-grid:
Is a workable favored option, Is not the plan if it doesn't work for others I want to be in community with, Is okay but not so important
Leisure time:
I host Dungeons and Dragons games, read, board games, movies, hiking, gardening, photography, crafting and building things
Films, books, music, podcasts, shows:
Lord of the rings, Harry Potter, Jury Duty, Kurtis Connor
Political orientation:
Progressive left
Culture influencers:
Adam Mockler, Jon Stewart
Extroversion (under 50% means more introverted than average):
4
Emotional even keel (under 50% means more ups & downs than average):
19
Agreeableness (under 50% means less compliant or more contrary than average):
83
Conscientiousness (under 50% means more easygoing than average):
59
Open to new experiences / imagination (under 50% means more traditional than average, sticks with "tried and true"):
67
Tendency for dealing with others' expectations:
Obliger
Myers-Briggs (& Keirsey-Bates) temperament type:
INTP
Weaknesses and superpowers:
Worrier, black and white thinking, trouble with doing too much at once
Dealbreakers:
Illegal Drug use, Lying, performative socialization, closed mindedness, disrespectful to strangers
Dealmakers:
Open mindedness, caring of their connections, responsible, honest, hardworking
On scale of 0 (imperturbable) to 27 (highly sensitive), 15 or more = HSP:
20
On scale of 0 (prefers calm & predictable) to 20 (sensation seeking):
7