uliruhe
Younger boomer (60-70)
Non-binary + Male
woodstock, ny 12498, NY U.S.
Speed of commitment:
In between: Open to a commitment after a defined time for a trial run
IC types I would live in or am forming:
Activist commune supporting shared work, Artist collective & live work space, Cottage industry in community (e.g. biz partners or recreation venture team), Ecovillage or agrihood, Ethnic culture-focused (e.g., BIPOC), Expat residential community, Farm or ranch, Housing or shelter for a vulnerable group, LGBTQ+ focused, Life partner also into community, Medical risk bubble, Mobile home park or RV spot, Multi-family shared house, Multi-house collective (resource-sharing among houses not adjacent), Off-grid, Resource-sharing or income-sharing commune, Shelter for homeless, Spiritual or religious focus, Tiny homes community, Trial run: Join a household maybe work-trade, Van life co-travelers
Food production:
Not involved in farming or gardening, Working toward a mix of producing our own food and buying groceries, Working toward producing all or nearly all of our own food
Service-based IC (population served):
Animal rescue, Chronically homeless, Low income LGBTQ+, Low income with high medical risk, Mild to moderate mental illness, Refugee resettlement
Service-based IC (services offered):
Long term shelter, Permanent residence, Provides housing while attending college or vocational training, Provides school or vocational training for the selected group(s), Provides support services possibly including paid work opportunities for the selected group(s), Provides van or RV spot, Provides work-trade for rent, Short term shelter
Vulnerable population as a proportion of residents:
All
Residential proximity:
House mates (separate bedrooms, shared kitchen), Multi-house collective (shared resources, but IC houses might be scattered within a traditional neighborhood), Roommates (okay to share bedroom), Separate units (separate apartments but some shared common areas with shared resources), Shared land (separate houses possibly with some shared buildings)
Ownership types:
Co-operative (collectively owned separate houses or apartments), Join an established IC to learn and possibly stay, Rent a room as a trial run, Whatever the group can agree on
Reasons for shared housing or land:
Ecological sustainability to reduce carbon footprint, Friendship and sharing activities, Having a “chosen family” to share good times and support each other thru hard times, Having social interaction while limiting the amount of influence or interaction with society, Lower cost of living, Shared land, shared community hub such as gardens or meeting space, but not shared housing), Sharing resources (spaces, equipment, tools, vehicles, gardens), Traveling frequently and wanting a home base that’s maintained, Working together in a business (e.g., remote location)
Décor of shared areas:
Decisions based on practical utility and durability, Not important, Other
Clutter level of shared living areas or work space:
Average level of "lived in" look, Clutter doesn't bother me, Creativity in progress (translate: not tidy in designated work space)
Cleanliness level (germs & crumbs):
All food counters & tables wiped down after each use, All food counters & tables wiped down daily to not attract pests, Dishes washed (or loaded into dishwasher) daily to not attract pests, Disinfectants must be ecologically safe products (chemical sensitivity), Disinfecting is not important, Dusting is not so important
Yard or landscaping:
Not applicable, Yard aesthetics are not a priority
Neighborhood or scenery:
Not applicable, Scenery is not high on the list of property characteristics that's worth paying extra for
Current city, town, or county:
woodstock, ny 12498
Nation(s) of current residence:
U.S.
Preferred regions worldwide:
European Union, India, United Kingdom
Population density:
Nomadic, Remote, Rural, Small town, Suburban or exurban, Urban
Commitment to my current location:
Other, Want to eventually commit to a permanent location if it goes well, Would relocate if group decides to try another location together
Relocation capacity:
Other, Ready to move from my current residence now or in the near future, Ready to move from my general area now or in the near future
State, province, or region:
New York (NY)
Resource sharing:
Car share, Care of elderly, disabled, or incapacitated relatives, Child care swap, Emergency preparedness efforts, Farm or food forest (share work and produce), Garden (share work and produce), Joint business (share work and profits), Meal preparation, Pet care swap, Time bank, Tool share (maintenance and use of expensive equipment)
My socioeconomic status:
Low income
Leisure and lifestyle:
Very frugal about leisure and entertainment expenditures
Leadership availability:
I'm willing to join as part of a core leadership team
Roles and responsibilities:
Flexible responsibilities are often best, which aren't assigned or micromanaged, In a reciprocal relationship you give about as much as you get, but it happens without keeping track, In a small family-like group, the saying applies, “to each according to their need, from each according to their abilities"
Common practical skills:
Carpentry & repair, Childcare, Cleaning, Cooking for groups
Experience or schooling:
Carpentry & construction, English language proficiency, Event planning & management, Musical performance, Outdoor survival skills (e.g., hunting, foraging, fire starting), Performative dance, Social dance, Visual art, Waterworks, plumbing, sanitation, Writing
Occupation(s) and expertise:
carpentry, plumbing, stone work, childcare, cooking, cleaning, customer service rep, music writing/performance
Years lived in an IC:
Lived with roommate(s) or housemate(s), No experience, but determined to make it work
Experience in community:
we've almost never lived alone. camping with friends as living situation, with roommates, with family
Professional certifications or degrees:
bachelor's of music & writing - american college
Generation:
Younger boomer (60-70)
Generations intended in IC:
Gen A (born 2013 – 2024), Gen B (babies! born 2025 – 2039), Gen X (born 1965 – 1980), Gen Z (born 1997 – 2012), Millennial (born 1981 – 1996), Older boomer (born 1946 – 1954), Pre-boomer (born before 1946), Younger boomer (born 1955 – 1964)
Number of infants and preschoolers:
none - but my zoomer and alpha sons would need to be welcome to stay/live&work
Number of grade-school children:
none, but i have two kids who may need to stay with us from time to time or potentially long term
Number of teens:
none
Number of working adults:
two
Alcohol (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed after work hours, Should be regulated by group decision only if it becomes problematic, Should not be allowed on the premises
Tobacco smoking (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed in designated indoor areas, Should not be allowed on the premises, Should only be allowed outdoors
Cannabis (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed after work hours, Should be allowed in designated areas only, Should be allowed with medical prescription, Should be regulated by group decision only if it becomes problematic, Should not be allowed on the premises, even if its legal in our location
Psychedelics (tolerable rules):
Legal psychedellics are okay if not disrupting to others, Should be allowed by those authorized to use them for ceremonial purposes, Should be allowed only in a legal supervised therapeutic setting
Illegal recreational drugs (tolerable rules):
Should be dealt with by group decision in a manner to support non-use, Should be grounds for expulsion from the community, Should not be allowed on the premises, Should not be policed by the community, as long as no minors are involved and others are not negatively impacted
Overnite guests (tolerable rules):
Should be allowed in designated guest areas, Should be permitted in limited circumstances as decided by the governance process, Should be subject to group decision only if it becomes problematic, Should not be a concern of the community, as long as everyone's privacy is respected
Daytime visitor access (tolerable rules):
Should be discussed and limited by the IC agreements, Should be restricted to guest areas or residence of host, Should not be restricted, Should not be restricted after certain individuals or visitor types are approved, Should require that community is informed of planned visits
Nudity (tolerable rules):
Should be limited to private rooms or private residences (as is the norm outside the IC), Should be permitted within designated areas of the IC (e.g., a gated hot tub), Should be welcome and discussed through the governance process, to consider each individual’s preferences
Required disclosures:
Current addictions even if under treatment, On sex offender registry
Religious or spiritual practice-based IC:
Mandate of adherence to shared religious beliefs and practices, No mandate of adherence to shared religious beliefs and practices
My religious beliefs or practices:
12 steps (from AA, NA, etc.), Agnostic, Astrology, Christian (universalist), Jewish, Near-death experience or out-of-body, New Age (mix), New Thought (law of attraction), Other, Spiritual but not religious, Taoist, Tarot
Practices welcome in IC:
12 steps (from AA, NA, etc.), Agnostic, Astrology, Atheist, Bahai, Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jainist, Jewish, Kabbalah, Mediumship, Muslim/Islam, Native American / First Nations, Near-death experience or out-of-body, New Age (mix), New Thought (law of attraction), Pagan, Pantheist, Rastafarian, Shamanic or indigenous animist, Sikh, Spiritual but not religious, Spiritualist, Taoist, Tarot, Thelema, Theosophical Society, Wiccan, Zoroastrian
Ecological preservation ethics:
Commitment to reduce, re-use, recycle, Composting toilet, Eating vegan, vegetarian, or certified humane animal products, Gray water recycling where permitted, Local food commitment for low carbon footprint, Minimize use of plastic, None of the above, Use of alternative power such as solar or wind
Belief-related practices:
any
Wisdom sharing:
we believe in the ~ golden rule ~ and we believe in the ~ good samaritan ~ we were raised bahai and "some christian schooling, but spiritual"
Size of community:
11 to 20, 21 to 50, 51 to 150, 6 to 10, Over 150, Under 6
Sense of togetherness:
An IC should foster close interpersonal relationships, An IC should have regular mandated “group work” to resolve conflicts as they arise, An IC should have regular opportunities to encourage all to share their feelings, I do not want obligatory group work where we are expected to help resolve disputes, I do not want to be required or pressured to share feelings in a group setting, Relationships should develop naturally, not thru team building exercises or mandated group circles
My gender identity:
Non-binary
Genders welcome in IC:
AFAB, AMAB, Female, Male, Non-binary
My current couple situation:
I'm in committed partnership
Couple situations welcome in IC:
Available somewhat (e.g., in open relationship), Committed closed partnership(s) (e.g., married monogamous couples), Not applicable, Not available (e.g., you're okay if you're not going to be a threat to my primary relationship), Single (not in a committed closed partnership)
My sexual orientation:
Pansexual
Sexual identities welcome in IC:
Cisgender (gender aligns with natal sex), Heterosexual (straight), LGBTQ+ (non-normative gender identity and/or same-sex attraction), Monogamous (committed to a single sexual partner)
Sex & intimacy norms in IC:
A topic discussed with curiosity and respect, allowing for experimentation around what works for the community, A topic not discussed by the community, Other, Primarily left to the individual to determine, with the understanding that personal choices can impact community culture
Physical affection:
I am a big hugger; I’m affectionate even with people I don't know well, I enjoy hugs and lean toward the easily affectionate side
My availability for physical intimacy:
Never would I ever be interested in casual sex, Not currently open to a new relationship, Prefer not to share at this time
Significant other(s):
Male
Socioeconomic status:
i have a student's stipend and my husband is a wonderful carpenter, stone worker, plumber, and sculptor
Gender and sexuality:
i am pansexual and my husband is straight
Diversity beliefs or intentions:
we are open to every member of the human family
Race & Ethnicity:
Black or African American, White
Children in IC:
Children are welcome but not a necessity (not a dealbreaker issue), Children are welcome if 8 or older and well-behaved (e.g., remote work group without childcare)
Children present in household:
No dependent children, Only visits such as holidays
Other people’s children:
Children are the responsibility of their parents, so any shared care needs to be agreed on between individuals, I am open to a community of free-range children who are allowed to roam the majority of community spaces unsupervised, I am open to sharing child-care responsibilities such as carpooling or swapping child-care, I prefer a community in which there are on-site designated childcare facilities to allow other adults to work, I want to be in a setting in which all feel a responsibility for well-being of children in the community, Parents shouldn't be so untrusting that they consider all adults a potential child abuser
Behavior correction:
Parents shouldn't be offended if other adults respectfully question their child(ren)'s behavior
Screen time (acceptable rules):
No screen time or content limits, Parents should agree on online content allowed (e.g. video games, social media) because children will share with each other, Screen time and content limits are up to individual families, Screen-free locations agreed on as a group, Screen-free times agreed on as a group to encourage outdoor play with peers
Dogs:
Indoor dog(s) not okay, Indoor dog(s) okay if non-shedding, Indoor dog(s) okay if small, Indoor dog(s) okay if some rooms are off limits, Not applicable, with separate residences each household decides, Outdoor dog(s) not okay, Outdoor dog(s) okay, Outdoor dog(s) okay if not frequent barkers
Cats:
Indoor cat(s) not okay, Not applicable, with separate residences each household decides, Outdoor cat(s) not okay, Outdoor cat(s) okay
Farm animals or pets I have or want:
dog
Special food needs:
Avoid over-processed foods with unpronounceable ingredients, Strongly prefer a high quality of food preparation, Strongly prefer freegan, Strongly prefer home-processed foods
Plant-based or not:
Strictly vegan (no animal products)
Organic:
All food choices are accepted, Commitment to all organic, Commitment to local-grown as much as possible, Commitment to non-GMO, Not applicable (e.g., no obligation for shared meals), Organic non-certified is okay
Shared meals (acceptable norms):
Prefer shared meals daily, Prefer shared meals weekly or monthly, Shared meals are necessary community glue, Shared meals are necessary for efficiency and low cost, Shared meals should be optional
Medical risk bubbles:
I am in a high-risk category and must have those near me take precautions seriously, I can commit to taking extra precautions for others in a high-risk category, I can live with or work physically close to people who do not take precautions against infection, allergy, or injury
Pandemic norms:
Keep good health practices for good immune function, Maintain strict social distancing and masks outside the IC, Masks only when in public and mandated, Not applicable, Only normal hygiene within the IC; no extra precautions, Sanitize hands frequently in public, Sanitize hands frequently in the IC, Unvaccinated, Vaccinated, Whatever results from group decision-making process
Severe allergies:
cats
Health conditions:
schizophrenia, bipolar, adhd, allergies
Accommodations needed:
Cognitive disability or condition, Mental health disability or condition, Severe allergy to cats
Noise level:
A lively social environment should be the norm, A quiet serene living space should be the norm, As long as the vibe is positive, loud gatherings can be frequent, Different noise tolerance can be managed by having designated times for noise and quiet, Just keep it down enuf that neighbors don't complain, One quiet space should be reserved for those who need to focus on work, One space should be available for those who like to have videos or games on frequently, Parents with children shouldn't have to constantly keep them quiet
Sleep:
I keep a late bedtime, I keep an early bedtime, I often stay up past midnight, I’m a late riser, I’m an early riser, I’m not very consistent with my waking and bedtimes, My sleep is not easily disturbed, Not applicable (e.g., not planning to share living space that's close to sleeping space)
Comfort & convenience:
I can participate in a rugged life and hard physical work, I can participate with others who do not tolerate rugged life or extreme temperatures, I cannot participate in a rugged life and hard physical work, I cannot tolerate extreme temperatures, I like my cushy life
Tech savvy:
I'm about average with tech use
Internet connection & phone signal:
I can work without consistent internet connection, I must have wifi on 24/7, I need to be consistently connected to wifi during work hours, We have adequate mobile phone signal to connect to internet, We have nearby library or cafe with wifi, We have reliable wifi
Off-grid:
Is a workable favored option, Is not the plan if it doesn't work for others I want to be in community with, Is not workable, Is okay but not so important, Is the definite only plan, Is workable for a part time location
Leisure time:
music, dance, vosual art, talking
Films, books, music, podcasts, shows:
interior chinatown, star wars, groundhog day, sherlock holmes, steptoe and son
Political orientation:
Outsider left
Culture influencers:
clash, robin hobb, jane austen, samantha irby, dan savage, kafka, david sedaris, crime and punishment, the cure, burning spear, stevie wonder, sam cooke, billie holiday, etta james, prince
Civic, political, or activist groups or movements:
animal rights, children's rights, LGBTQ rights, women's rights, black rights
Extroversion (under 50% means more introverted than average):
we are both introverts, i am an INFJ, he has never taken the meyer's briggs
Emotional even keel (under 50% means more ups & downs than average):
i have a flat affect due to diagnosis and medications, he is more expressive
Agreeableness (under 50% means less compliant or more contrary than average):
i am *very* compliant and he is less so. we are both unlikely to change our beliefs to fit in
Conscientiousness (under 50% means more easygoing than average):
we are both easygoing
Open to new experiences / imagination (under 50% means more traditional than average, sticks with "tried and true"):
i am more traditional, he is more adventurous
Myers-Briggs (& Keirsey-Bates) temperament type:
i am an INFJ
Astrological sign(s):
i am aries, he is pisces
Weaknesses and superpowers:
attention issues, hygiene issues (mental health related, to do with physical hygiene)
A note about me/us:
i am very strange and he seems very normal
Dealbreakers:
hoarding, OCD cleanliness, violence, cruelty, cat in my living space
Dealmakers:
open mindedness, affectionate, humor, veganism, permaculture
On scale of 0 (imperturbable) to 27 (highly sensitive), 15 or more = HSP:
i am an HSP and have tested for it in the past. he is able to take it as it comes.
On scale of 0 (prefers calm & predictable) to 20 (sensation seeking):
we are both pretty calm and predictable